I've been wanting to talk to someone (therapist) about my problems for awhile. This past relationship wit h Slm has shown me the things that are preventing me from becoming the person I want to be. She was and still is a motivating factor for my change, however this is my journey and I must travel it alone with some guidance to get started. I was able to get out of a daily pot habit. I quit for a month, and it began to feel great, but finding the person I've become was mostly disheartening. This loss of spirit is what motivates me to change, a little everyday.
My appointment is at 11:30a right around the corner from work. I'm hoping this will be a positive experience that helps me get started. "You can't see the forest from the trees."
Things I want to address:
- How to change my passive aggressive behaviors.
- How I can change being abusive.
- Determine whether I'm codependent.
- How I can stop letting emotions control my decisions.
- Become Goal Oriented.
I emailed Slm to let her know I'm getting the help I talked about. I was looking for at least an encouraging response, but... she is very angry at me and for good reason, I did terrible things to her that hurt her. Not because I didn't care about her, but because my love is abusive sometimes. This is not fair to her, myself or anyone I care about. I know she is keeping an eye on me from a distance and when she finds peace with herself I will be waiting with both ears open to listen to her journey. But I need to find peace with myself before I will find peace with anyone else, this much is painfully obvious.
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